More coming soon.

     Sorry about the delay folks but an ATM machine ate my bank card and I have no other access to my money until the new card arrives. No trouble eating because I've got a packed pantry but it's difficult to pick up the odds and ends for new recipes when you're broke. Oh well. I should be able to access my money again by the 24th and then we'll see what's cooking.

Strawberry Smoothie Mini Cakes

     Hey, people! This is my first post on the C-bus Digest.  I've been behind the scenes the whole time....watching you through the screen....waiting to strike with furious food knowledge.

Except not really.  I'm not very into the whole blog writing thing.  It's not my deal.  I've mostly been Will's kitchen assistant, restaurant buddy, and food photographer (speaking of photographing food, I WILL be taking better pictures! I just found my camera cord so I don't have to use the phone camera.)

     What brought me to writing a post was my recent recipe experiment.  Strawberry brownies. No chocolate, just awesome berry flavor and none of that strawberry cake mix or nesquik bull. 

Originally, I was looking for a thick, fudgy consistancy and tons of strawberry flavor, but during tonights 1 a.m. baking excursion I created something marvelous and unexpected.

Fluffy, delightful and moist with a thin, delicate, glazy crust of sugar. They don't quite seem like cupcakes to me. There's something different about them, in my opinion, but I'll call them cupcakes.

This recipe makes a LOT of mini cupcakes.

What you need:

1 cup room temp margarine
2 1/4 cups all purpose flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
2 1/4 cups white sugar
3 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 1/2 cups chopped strawberries
1/4 cup strawberry yogurt
1/4 cup strawberry jam
1/2 cup strawberry guava juice
a dallop of honey (about a tbsp)
(optional) 1 tsp Mango Amchur powder

     Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Line your mini muffin pans with cups. Spray the muffin papers with Baker's Joy, too. They stuck to our paper cups pretty well.
Combine the flour, salt, and baking powder. Feel ashamed as you 'sift' it with a whisk because you don't own a sifter....yet. Set it aside.

     This is the 'smoothie' part! Pull out your blender and throw the berries, yogurt, jam, juice, mango amchur, and a dollop of honey in there, then  blend well. Taste it. Its pretty good. Make your room mates taste it too. Set it aside.

     Cream the butter and sugar together until smooth. Whisk in those eggs, vanilla, and maybe a drop or two of red food coloring.
   
     Pour your blender-full of berry flavor into the butter mixture. Whisk it until its consistancy is uniform.
Whisk in the flour mixture about a half cup at a time. Whisk it until it is, once again, smooth. Scrape the sides as you go.

     Fill your cupcake cups about 2/3's full each.  Bake for 15 - 20 minutes or until springy when gently poked and a toothpick comes out clean.

Om Nom Nom Rings

     Onion rings, that delectable taste treat oh so many of us love to... treat like the weirdo cousin of the French Fried Potato. Oh sure, they're cool enough when they're hanging around, but much like Arnie from 'Hey Arnold!' you generally forget all about them five minutes after they leave. No more! Onion rings kick ass and you should be ashamed of yourself for hurting their feelings. After a long and tearful heart to heart I decided to help them step up their image and take their rightful place in the world of appetizers and side dishes as the bold and blazing star of the culinary world that they are, and should have always been. Really, they just needed a change of wardrobe, out with the soggy, droopy, old rags they usually wear and into a crisp spicy new get up that will make you go, 'Om nom nom, sweet thing, om nom nom...'

Here's What You'll  Need:

1 Large White Onion (cleaned and sliced into 1/4 inch rings, or thicker if you think you can handle all that flavor)
1 Cup Greek Yogurt
1 Cup Milk
1 Cup All Purpose Flour
1/2 Cup Cornmeal
1 Tablespoon Fresh Ground Peppercorn ( I used Peppercorn Melange)
2 Teaspoons Onion Powder
1/2 Tablespoon Chicken Base
1 1/2 Teaspoons Salt
1 Teaspoon Garlic Powder
Oil for frying

Here's What You'll Do:

1. Combine all of your wet ingredients in a medium bowl.
2. Combine all of your dry ingredients in a separate medium bowl.
3. Place your Onion Slices into a zip seal bag with half of your Flour Mixture and shake vigorously.
4. Pour remaining flour back into its bowl.
5. Take your rings out of the bag and one or two at a time drop them in your liquid mixture making sure to coat them evenly.
6. Pull them from the liquid and, trying unsuccessfully not to drip all over your counter, place them back into your flour mixture.
7. Pull the flour over the rings and press down on them with your open palm gently but firmly. This helps ensure that the flour adheres properly. At this point you can repeat steps 5-7 as many times as you want, though we here at The Columbus Digest would recommend against doing more than double dipping.
8. Drop rings one at a time into a preheated electric deep fryer or a Dutch Oven filled with about 6 cups of Canola or other frying oil. (Mary and I have a regular, Wal-Mart purchased Fry Daddy Electric Fryer, it's pretty damn convenient, resealable to keep your oil fresh for a few uses, and we feel like it was worth the $25.)
9. After about a minute flip each ring, a minute after that pull them out and place them on a plate lined with paper towels to absorb the extra oil.
10. Quickly wipe off your counter, I wasn't messing with you in step '6.' you probably dripped shit everywhere and it'll be the Dickens to get up if you let it dry.
11. Eat the Hell out of those onion rings, maybe with some ketchup that a wandering Hobo accidentally dropped a Basil Leaf into the way we did, or maybe with our Black as Midnight BBQ Sauce, or Wasabenero Sauce.

Spring Chicken Salad

     Light and refreshing, this dish trumpets that Spring has sprung with a burst of fresh fruit and fresh herbs. Though a quick warning, this is a bit more involved than some of our recipes...

Here's What You'll Need: For the Lime Mango Vinaigrette 
1 Small Ripe Mango (Peeled, Pitted, and Diced)
1/2 Cup White Vinegar (or Rice Wine Vinegar)
1/4 Cup of Clover Honey
1/4 Cup Soy Sauce
1 1/2 Tablespoons Brown Sugar
Juice from 1/2 Small Lime
1/2 Teaspoon Fresh Lime Zest
1/2 Teaspoon Salt

Here's What You'll Do: For the Vinaigrette 
1. Combine all ingredients in a small sauce pan.
2. Bring to a boil and reduce heat to simmer for 5 minutes.
3. Run through food processor on highest setting for 30 seconds.
4. Allow to cool completely.

Here's What You'll Need: For the Chicken
3 Boneless Skinless Chicken Breasts
1/2 of your Lime Mango Vinaigrette

Here's What You'll Do: For the Chicken
1. Place your Chicken Breasts into a zipper seal storage bag and pour half of your Vinaigrette over them.
2. Squeeze as much of the air as possible out of the bag and seal it.
3. Give the bag a good shaking to evenly coat the Chicken and allow to marinade for 45 minutes.
4. Bake Chicken for 45 minutes or until it reaches an internal temperature of 165 degrees Fahrenheit.
5. Allow the chicken 5-10 minutes to cool and slice into 1/4 inch thick slabs.

Here's What You'll Need: For the Salad
Your favorite salad "Fixins"
4-5 sprigs of fresh Cilantro (finely chopped)
Juice from the other 1/2 of that Lime, you know, from before

Here's What You'll Do: For the Salad
1. Mix your usual Salad ingredients with the Cilantro and Lime Juice
2. Separate into 3-4 bowls and top with Chicken Slices
3. Drizzle remaining Vinaigrette over your salads.
4. Enjoy the sensation of a fine damn Spring Day blossoming in your mouth.

Restaurant Review- Dirty Franks Hot Dog Palace

     The first time you hear the name, Dirty Franks Hot Dog Palace you'll probably laugh, then you'll ask if that is a real place. Well, it is, and despite it's name it's really a very clean establishment. Set right in the heart of down town on 4th Street, Franks still feels like a hidden treasure tucked away in 'The Discovery District'.

   
     Upon entering you'll first notice the decor, off beat hand painted posters for musical legends and sports greats, using just enough clutter to evoke the feeling of a filthy dive without any of the dirt, stains, or spills and their immaculately clean kitchen is open and visible not thirty feet away.
     Since I'm newer at this blogging business I don't usually carry photographer release forms on me, so I didn't catch any photo's of the crowd but it was an eclectic mix from middle aged men talking sports to hipsters probably trying to eat a new item before any of their friends so they can become disgusted with it when it catches on, from soccer moms to a guy who looked so stoned the painting of The Rolling Stones kept looking at him like it was worried.
     Matt, our server, was friendly and talkative without being disruptive to our meal. He was very knowledgeable about the restaurants expansive selection without giving unsolicited advice or opinions.

     

    Now on to the single most important aspect of any restaurant, the food. I always try to make at least 2 forays to an establishment before I review it, preferably with a few friends in tow so I can nibble off thier plates and get a broader view of what the kitchen is capable of doing. At this point I've had about six of Franks hot dog offerings, and they have all been excellent. Pictured above clockwise are: Onion Rings (big, juicy, Onion Rings, the kind that actually have a big ring of onion inside, not the more common onion powder flavored corn chip tasting mother fuckers you see everywhere. These are onion rings worth hopping on a bus  to down town for...), The Seoul Dog (topped with deliciously spicy 'why won't you kiss me' Korean Kim Chee), and The Slappy Pappy's Super Sloppy ( my arteries may never be the same, but they will ALWAYS look back at this heaping mess of a hot dog with fond memories and hopes for many happy returns.) The price for everything shown above: about ten bucks, well worth it for the quality ingredients, creative flair, and amazing flavors.

Final Ranking

A+ (Great food at great prices, unique decor, great service, and a ton of culinary creativity, Dirty Franks Hot Dog Palace turn Hot Dogs from what you eat when the burgers run out into a show stopping flavor powerhouse.)

Plus I saw this on the way in... how sweet is that?!

Dirty Franks Online

Potato Candy?

     Yes, Potato Candy, soft, creamy, delicious, puzzlement inducing. The most common reaction when I mention Potato Candy is, 'Potato What? Eww!' The most common reaction when people try it for the first time is, 'Oh wow, that's amazing! There are potatoes in this?' Now normally I try to give you folks neatly measured recipes but Potato Candy is more magic than science so you really just have to do it by gut feel.

Here's What You'll Need:
1 Mashed Potato
A LOT (I mean it, have a ton of it on hand) of Powdered Sugar
Some Peanut Butter

Here's what you'll do:
1. Put some mashed potato into a large mixing bowl and start mixing in powdered sugar till it forms a thick dough. In the famous words of the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, 'DON'T PANIC.' When you first start mixing in the Powdered Sugar it will turn into a weird thin gruel, just keep adding more until it thickens.
2. Place the dough between two sheets of waxed paper and roll it out into a long thin sheet.
3. Spread a layer of peanut butter across the sheet of dough leaving about 1/2 an inch clearance on each edge.
4. Roll the dough up as tightly as possible (which is usually not very) and allow it to set for 30 minutes.
5. Cut into 1/2 inch thick slices and allow to set an additional 30 minutes so that they harden and are no longer sticky.
6. Eat those tasty little spud sweets.

Update

We're (mostly) moved into our new place, especially our new kitchen, and things will get back onto a more regular schedule of posts, and our new living arrangement means we'll finally have the money to get back into restaurant reviews soon... of course, we do  have to save for our wedding this September.

Berry Blast Cheesecake (No-Bake Recipe)

     There are two kinds of cheesecake, excellent, and even more excellent. A plain cheesecake, whether baked, or no-bake is an indulgent delight, melting on the tongue and sending your spirit soaring like a bird on wing. This recipe takes those hall mark traits and adds the subtle joy of a summer day spent berry picking, so, you know, Fuck Yeah!

Here's What You'll Need: For the Berry Sauce
1/2 Cup Raspberries
1/4 Cup Blackberries
2 Tablespoons Blackberry Preserves
2 Tablespoons Powdered Sugar
2 Tablespoons Cornstarch

Here's What You'll Do: For the Berry Sauce

1. Put everything in a blender or food processor
2. Blend on high until smooth and glossy

Here's What You'll Need: For the Cheesecake
16 Ounces of Cream Cheese (At Room Temperature)
8 Ounces of Cool Whip
1 Cup Powdered Sugar
3/4 Cup Corn Starch
1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Here's What You'll Do: For the Cheesecake
1. Combine all of your wet ingredients on a large bowl and mix until smooth and creamy. (I recommend a mixer for this, but you're free to develop Carpal Tunnel if that's what you're into...)
2. Slowly add your dry ingredients until the mixture reaches a thick enough consistency that when you pull the beaters out it forms stiff peaks, like tasty little mountain ranges.
3. Pour half of your Berry Sauce into the mixture and gently fold in until it is mostly combined but still has the occasional swirl.
4.Using a spatula  transfer the mixture into a Graham Cracker or Cookie Crust and cover with plastic wrap.
5. Refrigerate for 30 minutes to allow mixture to set.
6. Slice.
7. Drizzle each slice with a little of the remaining Berry Sauce, possibly garnishing with left over Berries or shiny foil wrapped candies that provide color contrast for the pictures you will randomly be taking.
8. Enjoy... like I have to tell you to enjoy Cheesecake...

Sorry for the Delay

Income tax time has made work incredibly hectic and I've been bogged down for the better part of half a month now. Nothing says tax return like an expensive dinner out after all. Add to that, Mary and I just got engaged and are moving to a much better apartment so things have been a little out of control. We'll be getting back to regular updates as soon as possible.

On the Topic of: A Pantry

     According to the first definition listed on Dictionary.com a Pantry is: a room or closet in which food, groceries, and other provisions, or silverware, dishes, etc., are kept. And while I wouldn't advocate giving up a whole room for groceries, I do strongly recommend building up a stock of them ahead of time. Cooking isn't something most people do everyday, some people not even every week some only cook once a year for a family reunion or holiday get together. So, why have a pantry? I'm assuming that since you're reading this article, well any article on my blog really, that you cook, or are learning to cook, but that doesn't mean that you have given a pantry much consideration, I know I didn't till I moved to Columbus.
     When I moved here I was out of work for a couple months, just living off of the little savings I had and selling what used to be a fairly impressive collection of extremely nerdy movies on DVD. I had been lead to believe that I was going to be stepping into a fairly solid job but the position was filled while I was loading up the U-Haul. Understandably my diet went to shit. I was feeding myself and my fiance on $20 a week, mostly spent at the Dollar General near my home. Even after I got a job hours were short for the new guy and we were still mostly living off the proceeds of box seasons of Avatar: The Last Airbender and Gilmore Girls(don't judge me.)
     I was so trapped in the day to day struggle that I couldn't see a way out, until I started thinking about rice and noodles. Rice and noodles are your salvation when you're on the borderline of starvation, healthy, filling, and most importantly, cheap. But still expensive when you're buying them a pound at a time. So, on a rare week when our food budget jumped to a whopping $30 I went to Wal-Mart and bought it, the big bag of Great Value Rice. It was, I think, $8.00 for 20 pounds. We'd been buying about 2 pounds a week for $2.00. For those of you who don't want to do the math I just got 10 weeks worth of rice for $8 instead of $20. While it showed no immediate benefit, eating up most of my extra food money it did put me a little bit ahead.
     The following week I spent the $2.00 I didn't need to spend on rice along with the money I normally spent on peanut butter and a few extra and bought an 'Institutional size,' Peanut butter. If you've never seen the 'Institutional size' before, it is a 6 pound cylinder made for things like schools, day cares, and nursing homes who need to feed about a hundred people everyday. The next week I didn't have to buy Rice or Peanut Butter and I spent the money I normally spent on them on a 50 pound bag of flour and a 5 gallon bucket to put it in, the next week a 25 pound bag of sugar, etcetera, etcetera.
     This was pure Hell for the first few weeks, plain and simple. Mary thought I was crazy, we had more food in the house than ever before, but even less variety, basically all Rice and Peanut Butter Sandwhiches. It sucked, but as time wore on and we made additions to our 'Pantry' things became much easier. The addition of Flour added Pancakes and simple unleavened Breads to our diet, Sugar added Cakes and Cookies, and each addition loosened up a few extra dollars to broaden our shopping a little. Eventually we could have a week where all of our 'essentials' were taken care of and we could buy a bulk pack of meat to separate, then another, then another. And separate it we did, a five pound roll of Ground Beef became 20 quarter pound baggies to be added to rice or put over noodles. A five pound Beef Roast became a one pound Beef Roast, two half pound Steaks, and six half pound bags of cubes.
     And eventually work picked up, I caught on to corporate culture and started getting more than 15 hours a week and my grocery budget gradually rose with it. This is the point where it could have fallen apart. A clever shopper can EASILY feed two people on $30 a week if they have that every week, and believe me, you get to be an awfully damn clever shopper when you are barely managing to stay fed and sheltered on your budget. But if the 'Pantry System' helps you eat better and get ahead when you're dead broke, it changes your life when you have a little more cash to pump into it.
     A well stocked Pantry can allow you the freedom to branch out and buy things that you've never tried, buy things you love that are normally outside your logical budget, and sometimes allow you to skip the grocery store altogether. The only limit being your patience and persistance.
     But the Pantry has its limitations, fresh fruits and vegetables, Milk and Eggs, anything that rots, spoils, or reanimates as some sort of undead monstrosity after a week in the refridgerator is not a great candidate for storage unless you plan on cooking it off and freezing it, canning it, or dehydrating it. Getting a Farmers Market to give you a bulk discount on 25+ pounds of tomatoes is awesome... IF you plan on making bulk Marinara sauce for a family reunion, but in most cases it just means you are going to have a lot of ammunition for bad street theater in about a week and a half. So, exercise a little sense when shopping.
     The Pantries greatest weakness though, is disorganization and forgetfulness. Make sure to keep a list of what you run out of, because I promise there will be few times in your life where you feel stupider than when you believe you have 10 pounds of butter but in fact you have none because you haven't bought it for 4 months.