Baba Yaga Ganoush

     Smooth with a subtle smokiness and a lingering bite, our Baba Yaga Ganoush  is a great dip or sandwich topper, low in calories and fat and high in flavor. If you're wondering why I related this Middle-Eastern favorite with a Russian folk tale I have just three words for you, "Mortar and Pestle." Look it up.

Here's What You'll Need:

1 Large Eggplant (about a pound and a half)
2 Tablespoons Tahini
2 Tablespoons Lemon Juice
3 Cloves of Garlic
1 Tablespoon Olive Oil
1 Tablespoon Black Sesame Seeds
2 Teaspoons Applewood Smoked Sea Salt
1/2-1 Teaspoon Habenero Powder

Here's What You'll Do:


1. Poke holes all across the skin of your Eggplant with a fork, the more holes the smokier your Baba will taste.
2a. (For those with an Electric Stove) On a foil lined cookie sheet place your Eggplant under your Broiler on high, rotating every few minutes to evenly blacken the skin. The longer you go with this step the more of a smokey flavor your Baba will develop as the smoke from the burnt outer skin makes its way in through your previously poked air holes.
2b. (For those with a Gas Stove) Using tongs (and an oven mitt, I hope you guys already knew this part) rotate your Eggplant over a medium flame from one of your burners allowing the skin to blacken evenly.
3. Bake your Eggplant for 20-30 minutes at 375 degrees Fahrenheit until tender enough that a fork meets little resistance at the center.
4. Allow to cool. And scoop the insides into your largest Mortar and Pestle (or Food Processor if you're feeling lazy) and grind to a paste with all other ingredients, saving the Sesame Seeds for last and just giving them a quick stir in.
5. Gobble that shit down on some crackers, or tortilla chips, or even the traditional flat bread of your choice.

Berry Blast Cheesecake (No-Bake Recipe)

     There are two kinds of cheesecake, excellent, and even more excellent. A plain cheesecake, whether baked, or no-bake is an indulgent delight, melting on the tongue and sending your spirit soaring like a bird on wing. This recipe takes those hall mark traits and adds the subtle joy of a summer day spent berry picking, so, you know, Fuck Yeah!

Here's What You'll Need: For the Berry Sauce
1/2 Cup Raspberries
1/4 Cup Blackberries
2 Tablespoons Blackberry Preserves
2 Tablespoons Powdered Sugar
2 Tablespoons Cornstarch

Here's What You'll Do: For the Berry Sauce

1. Put everything in a blender or food processor
2. Blend on high until smooth and glossy

Here's What You'll Need: For the Cheesecake
16 Ounces of Cream Cheese (At Room Temperature)
8 Ounces of Cool Whip
1 Cup Powdered Sugar
3/4 Cup Corn Starch
1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Here's What You'll Do: For the Cheesecake
1. Combine all of your wet ingredients on a large bowl and mix until smooth and creamy. (I recommend a mixer for this, but you're free to develop Carpal Tunnel if that's what you're into...)
2. Slowly add your dry ingredients until the mixture reaches a thick enough consistency that when you pull the beaters out it forms stiff peaks, like tasty little mountain ranges.
3. Pour half of your Berry Sauce into the mixture and gently fold in until it is mostly combined but still has the occasional swirl.
4.Using a spatula  transfer the mixture into a Graham Cracker or Cookie Crust and cover with plastic wrap.
5. Refrigerate for 30 minutes to allow mixture to set.
6. Slice.
7. Drizzle each slice with a little of the remaining Berry Sauce, possibly garnishing with left over Berries or shiny foil wrapped candies that provide color contrast for the pictures you will randomly be taking.
8. Enjoy... like I have to tell you to enjoy Cheesecake...

Hangry Girl Hummus

     The first time I ever heard the term 'Hangry,' was from my Fiance Mary, who went on to explain that the term means, 'Hungry enough that it's making you angry.' But after careful observation I've learned that it tends to be more of a slow simmering fury than a simple anger, and truth be told I've felt it's effects many times in my life, I just lacked a word to explain it.
      When Mary gets in this state there is only one solution, feed her, quickly. That's why I developed 'Hangry Girl Hummus,' smooth, creamy, delicious, and most importantly, QUICK to make.

Here's what you'll need:
2 Cans Chick Peas (also called Garbanzo Beans) one drained one un-drained
1/2 Red Bell Pepper
2 Tablespoons Lemon Juice
1 1/2 Tablespoon Tahini (This is a ground Sesame Seed Paste, available in the Middle-Eastern foods section of most places here on the West Side.)
2 Teaspoons Garlic Powder
2 Teaspoons Salt

Here's what you'll do:

1. Throw it all in a food processor or blender and run it on high until smooth and creamy.
2. Enjoy on Pita Bread, Crackers, Chips, or as a condiment on Sandwiches 

Or:

1. Throw it all in a food processor or blender and run it on high until smooth and creamy.
2. Pose it next to the other half of the Red Pepper on a lemon shaped cutting board with a little Cilantro sprinkled on top to emphasize its color. Then take photo's of it, like a weird food obsessed nut job. This is clearly the option I went with....

Mochanut Pie

     Chocolate, Coffee, Coconut, Crust, four C's worth sailing in my opinion, if you care about my opinion. Better yet if you can take them all in one trip to tantalize the taste buds and titillate the tongue, and my Mochanut Pie is just the ship to sail you there .

Here's What You'll Need:

3 Cups Heavy Cream (1 Cup Reserved)
1/2 Sugar
1/2 Cup Toasted Coconut (Reserved)
1/2 cup Chocolate Syrup
3 Packets Hot Cocoa Mix
8 Tablespoons cornstarch (Reserved)
3 Tablespoons Instant Coffee (This is optional, but it's exclusion would make it a Choconut Pie, you can't have Mocha without Coffee.)
1 Graham Cracker or Cookie Crust (Store bought also works)

Here's What You'll Do:

1. Mix all ingredients except those reserved in a medium sauce pan and place over medium heat, stirring frequently.
2. In a small bowl mix reserved Heavy Cream and Cornstarch until fully integrated. Make certain your crust is sitting nearby.
3. When the contents of the sauce pan reach a boil add the Cream and Cornstarch mixture and whisk as though your life depends on it until the mixture is the consistency of thick pudding.
4. Pour immediately into your crust.
5. Sprinkle Toasted Coconut over the top of the pie and gently press down to insure that the Coconut sticks to the surface of the filling.
6. Allow to cool for 30-60 minutes, until the filling is warm, but not hot, then wrap in plastic wrap and chill in the fridge for at least 8 hours.
7. Cut into no fewer than 6 pieces ( Okay, this is really your call, but this pie is extremely heavy and rich, if you cut it in quarters you might as well schedule in a  delightful Chocolate Coma Time afterwards.)
8. Enjoy!

(Bonus Points: Sliced Almonds, Pecans, Peanuts, Chocolate Chips(you masochist), crumbled Oreo's, all make excellent additions in Step 5, or even Chopped Chocolate Covered Coffee Beans if you want to make people fawn over you and leave you uncomfortably intimate Thank You letters.)

Day after the Cook-out Corn and Chicken Chowder

     Perfect Autumn food,this chowder is rich, creamy, and uses up some of those delicious left-overs from yesterdays Cook-Out. Or if nothing was left after friends, family, and neighbors poking their head over the fence finished off every last morsel, it can be made up from scratch.

Here's what you'll need:
5 cups of Corn (Cut off a Cook-Out Cob or from a can)
4 Cups Diced Cooked Chicken Breast (Covered in grill lines, or straight out of the frying pan or oven)
4 Cups Cold Diced Baked Potatoes (Make sure they've cooled or they'll smash instead of slice)
1 Quart Heavy Cream
1 Cup Cold Water
2 Tablespoons of Black Pepper
2 Tablespoons of Flour
2 Tablespoons of Cornstarch
1 1/2 Tablespoons of Chicken Base

Here's what you'll do:

1. Combine the Cold Water, Flour, and Cornstarch in a small bowl with a whisk.
2. Combine all other ingredients in a large pot and mix thoroughly.
3. Place over a medium heat and bring to a boil, stirring frequently.
4. Add Water, Flour, Cornstarch, mixture stirring constantly until thickened.
5. Enjoy.
6. This recipe makes approximately 18 cups of very rich chowder, you may want to invite some friends over.